


Made the Same (the look in your eyes)

by lucdarling



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Banter, Billy Hargrove Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Bisexual Billy Hargrove, Canon Lesbian Character, Coming Out, Friendship, Gen, Period Typical Attitudes, mention of the aids crisis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:02:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24310990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lucdarling/pseuds/lucdarling
Summary: This is not how she saw her Wednesday ending. The most popular boy in school, the one who took Hawkins High by storm when he rolled in, comes out to her standing in the dead December grass two days before winter break officially starts.Billy spreads his hands and helplessly shrugs. “You don’t decide who you love, Buckley.” She wonders when he learned her name, who he had to ask.
Relationships: Robin Buckley & Billy Hargrove
Comments: 22
Kudos: 124





	Made the Same (the look in your eyes)

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted some friendship between these two. Unbeta'd so any mistakes are mine.

**I.**  
Robin pushes the door open and stops in the doorway when she catches sight of blond curls.

“Uh,” she says, trying to gather her thoughts at finding the most popular boy in school in the place where only band and choir kids go to ditch. “The jock hangout is under the bleachers, do you need a map?”

One day, her tongue is probably going to get her in real trouble. Today, thankfully, it only gets a laugh.

“Feisty, aren’t ya?” Billy Hargrove says, lighting the cigarette that dangles from his mouth. “I didn’t see any sign.” He makes a show of looking around, putting a hand to shade his eyes as he looks up and down the wall he leans against.

“Fine,” Robin huffs and bends down to put the loose brick in its usual spot, propping open the door so they don’t get locked out.

“You smoke?” Billy asks, taking a long drag.

“No, I just need to be away from the trumpets fighting.” Robin rolls her eyes because this happens at least once a week. One day the director is going to actually notice instead of focusing on the skirt length of the first chair flautist, but today isn’t that day.

“Ah, band geek,” Billy hums. “Explains why I’ve never seen you before.”

“Hard to notice the peons when you’re on a pedestal, basketball star,” Robin shoots back deadpan.

Billy shrugs. “It’s easy to be great when there’s no competition.”

“There’s not a lot going on in Hawkins at any given time,” Robin says with a snort.

“You can say that again,” Billy hums and Robin leans against the brick wall opposite him. It’s surprisingly peaceful, the rattle of cars on the main road on the other side of the parking lot the only thing to be heard.

“So, what’s California like? Sun, sand and girls as far as the eye can see?” Robin cracks first and watches Billy shrug again.

“Better than here. Of course there’s sun, real sun not this weak imitation.” He waves a hand at the clouds that rolled in last week and have yet to leave. To Robin, it’s a usual November.

“Sand gets everywhere, in everything.” Billy says, voice a little quieter like he’s lost in a memory. “It’s hot under your feet in the summer, stings like a bitch until you run into the water. The ocean can be cold, most tourists don’t expect that.”

Robin hums. “Never been, obviously. Lake Michigan is plenty cold and seems like an ocean.”

“It’s not,” Billy says immediately, eyes snapping to hers. They’re very blue and hold her hostage. “Don’t make me laugh, band geek.”

“Ah, there he is,” Robin says grandly, like one of the television show hosts her mother puts on when she can’t sleep at night. “Keg King Billy, wondered when you would show up. And we were having an actual conversation, for shame! Did it hurt, to be nice to someone outside your social circle for once?”

“Fuck off,” Billy grumbles and drops his smoke. He grinds it under a boot and storms toward the door, kicking the brick out of the way.

“Asshole!” Robin yells, uncaring that the band room is right down the hallway and if she’s too loud she’ll definitely be overheard. Billy flips her the bird as the door shuts behind him and Robin rolls her eyes. She’s going to get a tardy because now the door’s shut and she’ll have to trek around to the front of the school to get to the band room again.

**II.**  
Their second meeting is more public, if it can even be called a meeting when they don’t exchange words at all. Robin is waiting for Jennifer to finish doing whatever in her locker - rearrange her photographs of Rob Lowe and Emilio Estevez or whoever her celebrity of the month is, touch up her makeup - things Robin doesn’t care about at all and not only because she’d be hanging photos of Andie MacDowell if they put that in magazines that girls her age giggle at and if Robin bought them in the first place.

Billy’s leaning against a locker, cigarette tucked behind his ear like he can’t wait to get outside and light up. Robin’s surprised he isn’t fidgeting if he’s got a habit like that, wonders if it’s just to look some idea of cool.

She catches his eye by accident and he winks, lips turning up slightly. Jennifer slams her locker shut and pulls at Robin’s arm before she can think of anything to say. She settles for raising her middle finger and his laughter follows her down the hallway.

**III.**  
The third time they meet, and of course they keep meeting because Hawkins High is small, is outside again. Robin’s definitely not watching as Tammy Thompson bends over to put her stack of textbooks in the backseat of Mark’s sedan. Tammy is the first crush who she could actually reach out and touch, unlike Andie and Winona who stay immortalized and unattainable on the screen. Tammy’s unattainable too, because Robin can’t feel out her parents without letting on and she’s nearly 18 but she doesn’t want to move out. To be kicked out.

She tells herself at night that her parents love her, they’d do anything for her - but you never really know until you know and Robin’s not ready to find out the truth.

Billy appears next to her with no warning. She shouldn’t be surprised that unlike others, his cologne hasn’t worn off after a day of high school. It’s strong and Robin coughs just to make a point.

“You know, you’re supposed to wear it lightly, not bathe in the stuff,” she snarks and he grins at her, boyish charm and blond curls.

“How else would the ladies remember me?”

Robin snorts, covering her mouth. “You saying the backseat of your hot rod isn’t enough? I didn’t think you had any issues in that department, god knows the girl’s bathroom still won’t stop talking about you and Cindy last month.”

Billy rolls his eyes and follows Robin’s gaze across the parking lot. “That’s why you were asking about California.” His voice is very quiet, and serious. Too serious for a boy who swaggers down the hallways like a jaguar surrounded by house cats.

Cold sweat breaks out on Robin’s spine and she spins on a heel to leave, to go drown herself in the quarry or something equally final. A large hand catches her wrist as she rounds the corner.

“Get off of me!” she snaps and Billy stares down at her.

“Hush,” he says sternly, hand tightening and Robin closes her mouth. She follows him just around the corner, trembling and hates the feeling. Billy closes his eyes for a long blink and wow, Robin is only just now noticing how long his lashes are. His hand drops from around her wrist.

“California girls are gorgeous,” Billy says softly. Car doors slam around them, friends calling out to each other about the weekend’s party and rides home. “Long legs, tan skin, you’d love ‘em.”

“No.” Robin whispers. Billy gives her a look that says he can see right through her.

“California boys are just as pretty,” Billy’s voice cracks and Robin’s mouth opens. “It’s a lot easier there to be yourself. It’s not perfect, nowhere is with the crisis,” Robin shakes her head because yeah, she’s been watching the news too and knows the government won’t step in for a minority. “But in California, they don’t mind so much.”

“You?” Robin whispers and blinks rapidly so she doesn’t cry. She’s not alone, finally. This is definitely not how she saw her Wednesday ending. The most popular boy in school, the one who took Hawkins High by storm when he rolled in, comes out to her standing in the dead December grass two days before winter break officially starts.

Billy spreads his hands and helplessly shrugs. “You don’t decide who you love, Buckley.” She wonders when he learned her name, who he had to ask to get that piece of information. “You can do better than Tammy though, she’s a harpy.”

“She’s pretty. I didn’t want to hold a conversation with her.” Robin shrugs. She manages to smile through chapped lips and her nerves steady.

Billy returns it, curls swaying when he leans forward to take Robin’s wrist in his hand. “You okay?”

He looks worried and Robin brushes him off because her wrist hardly aches. “I’m living nearly every girl’s dream, getting dragged behind the school with the keg king. I’m not getting on my knees though, not even if you beg.”

Billy cackles. “You might be one of the few good things in this town.”

“Jury’s still out on you,” Robin shoots back, smiling to soften the words. Billy shrugs like he isn’t bothered.

“Catch you around,” He waves just before he rounds the corner and Robin stands there behind the school, taking deep breaths and asking herself if that conversation really happened.

She gets in her car the next morning with shaking hands, mind whirling with what-ifs. She enters the school a step behind Jennifer and another girl from her Calculus class whose name might be something starting with a C or K. Her mind is scattered, waiting for the spotlight to turn on her, high school gossip to spread her name faster than light.

It never comes, even as Robin’s leg bounces all through English and she bites her lip almost bloody in History. It’s a near thing she doesn’t scream when a hand pulls her into a closet.

Billy’s standing there, face blank like he’s bored. “You need a smoke?” he offers her his pack and she shakes her head.

“Sure?” Billy double checks. “You’ve been twitching all day like you’re coming off something. I didn’t think there was anything stronger than ditch weed around these parts.”

“I wouldn’t know,” Robin says honestly. “I don’t get invited to those sorts of parties.” Her cousin always hooks her up if she needs a joint. She still doesn’t understand why she and Billy are in a closet but the irony isn’t lost on her.

“Don’t say it,” Billy says, wagging a finger in her face like he can read her mind. He smiles though, and it reaches his eyes. Robin laughs anyway, muffled by her hand.

“Bell’s going to ring in a few minutes.” Robin says, when she’s calmed down and wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Great, that's enough time for you tell me what the fuck is going on.” Billy answers and gives her another searching look, just like he did yesterday. “Someone giving you a hard time?”

Robin blinks. “Uh, no.” Her fingers come up to play with her necklaces, tugging and running over the silver chains. “I just expected, uh-” She expected him to be the worst version of himself, the same one that beat Steve Harrington half dead over Halloween weekend. Robin swallows the words down but Billy hears them anyway.

“Not to you,” he shakes his head and rubs a hand over his face. “We’re the same, and I wouldn’t do that to you. Fucking small towns.” His face darkens and Robin gets the feeling there’s a story but it’s not in her to ask. She isn’t sure she wants the knowledge.

“Great, glad we had this talk in a closet of all places.” Just saying the words sets her off again and Billy rolls his eyes as the late bell rings. He opens the door and pushes her into the hallway with a firm hand between her shoulder blades.

“Get to class, geek.”

“Your adoring fans await,” Robin waves her hand airily. Billy doesn’t bother to respond, sauntering off in the opposite direction.

Robin gets through the last two periods calmly and drives home with a smile on her face that isn’t only due to the music on the radio.

**IV.**  
It’s good to have something like a friend who knows. They don’t talk about what bonds them, not in the hallways. Sometimes Robin will sit in Billy’s car at lunch, screaming into her hands because everything seems so pointless.

High school supposedly prepares them for college, but Robin knows that’s very much not true thanks to phone calls with her cousin at IU and she can’t stand it. Surrounded by boys who won’t stop macking on their girl of the month as the weather grows warmer, and the girls themselves who are pretty and giggly and everything Robin doesn’t want.

She figures out Billy’s crush in the spring, when basketball has moved from something to use up time during gym and into hours-long practice held after school. She’s still at school herself thanks to a tutoring session that ran late.

Billy’s first out of the locker room, blond curls dark and still dripping water.

“Gotta be home by six, Rob. I’m gonna slow down and push you out, just remember to tuck your head before you hit the ground.” Billy is agitated, fingers tapping at the steering wheel as she shuts the passenger door.

She laughs, because it’s not the first time he’s made the threat and Billy has never once pushed her out of his car. He pulls a cigarette out of the pack on his dashboard before they’re even out of the parking lot.

“Did you get an eyeful today, Hargrove? Watching all the water slide down all those boy’s bodies-”

“Shut up!” Billy hits the steering wheel and Robin shuts her mouth. He doesn’t look at her, one hand digging in his jeans for his lighter.

“Sorry,” she grinds out between clenched teeth, because that’s what you say when your teasing has clearly touched a nerve. Billy shakes his head and takes a long drag. He blows the smoke out the window, not at her so she knows it’s been accepted.

“His fucking moles are gonna be the death of me,” Billy mutters, barely louder than the David Bowie that Robin slipped into his tape deck.

Robin’s eyes shoot up toward her hairline and the Camaro makes a left turn onto her street. “You mean-”

“Yeah,” Billy sighs. “He’s so goddamn pretty.” It’s almost a whine and Robin grins at him. She pops her tape out and sticks it in her backpack as the car slows down in front of her house.

“He’s always been pretty,” Robin says, because she can see that even if it does nothing for her. “Don’t worry, you’re pretty too. If you like too much cologne and metal music, that is.”

Billy rolls his eyes and shoves lightly at her shoulder. “Get out of my car, Buckley.”

“I’m going!” she sing-songs, opening the door. “See you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Billy says, head bent to look in the glove compartment for new music. “You’re gonna love it.” It is a house show by a band Billy thinks he heard of back in California, playing on the outskirts of Indianapolis. All Robin knows is that the lead singer isn’t shy about being gay, which is a message she can get behind even if she can’t yell it from the rooftops yet. She’s looking forward to the show.

**V.**  
Senior year is difficult for Robin, after the summer’s events. There’s no Billy in the hallways, only in her memories.


End file.
